Tag Archives: Studio

23 Weeks – Week of the Kicks, and Nests.

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The Photos are a few days late in fairness, 23 + 3… but at least I took them this week! The double photo, has a comparison – week 22 vs. today 23+3.

I have to say I am gobsmacked at the difference. A lot of people have been saying that the didn’t think I had grown, and I was pretty sure I wasn’t growing all that much either. BUT apparently that isn’t the case! I am STILL growing!! and fast too! when I look in the mirror though I don’t seem to be any bigger and no one else thinks I am either – in fact the wife thought I had lost weight over the last week!!

Might be because I have been eating and craving fruit like its going out of fashion – I am glad because I would rather crave fruit than chocolate – although that said I did eat a box of chocolates over the last couple of days – ooops!!

So – this week…. It’s official… theres a weird alien inside me…. and you can feel it from the outside!! The sensations changed again when he moves, and it always takes me a couple days to realise that it’s him kicking and thats what the sensation is! So anyways I decided to shove the wife’s hand on my belly, as she has been getting upset she couldn’t feel anything as I have been feeling him move for weeks, well anyways – these kicks were very different and it was bizarre to be able to feel it on the inside and outside simultaneously. It was like some kind of… well I don’t even know how to explain it – a bit like a heart beat, or something huge literally knee-ing our hands!! and to me now, it feels like someone is having a proper rummage around my insides!

The other update – ‘Nesting’ ohh boy – I seem to have these ridiculous urges to clear out X or Y, and sort out Z. So much so, I forced my wife to help me finish unpacking the ENTIRE house!! box after box after box!! Clean down the furniture in the babies room, and unfortunately help me vacate my studio. I had to take the decision to get rid of it, because my wages will be cut so significantly that I wont be able to afford to keep it whilst I am on Maternity Leave… but thats another story I will tell you about another day.

Writers Fear

‘Writers Fear’ is real, I have it.

I reached a point of self doubt and self loathing and fear of failure, and its sucking me dry. I am at a point in the planning where I ought to be making definitive decisions, or at least my brain is telling me that I should. I have got quite far through, but have the last hard slog of final character plotting, and deciding what happens in which chapter, but instead of doing it and getting on with it, I have been paralysed with fear.

I cant seem to do anything. I am finding excuses for not writing in the studio… some reasonable, like the fact I don’t have a stool high enough to fit the table, but the point is I am procrastinating, I am afraid that I might run out of ideas and not be able to finish the planning, I am really afraid of that and it’s making me stall, preventing me from being productive, or from doing anything… at all.

I cant decided how much planning is too much, and more importantly, it’s a frightening though that if I do finish the planning then I actually need to sit down and write it, and what if I can’t?

Despite all these, I am aching to crack on and to start writing, but I refuse to write anything until all the planning is done. Maybe I shouldn’t have tried to write novels simultaneously!!

Sacha Black Creations inc… Stage 2

As promised an update on the studio. I still need some carpet, a bar stool and a coffee table, but its getting there. The purple wall with the frame is specifically for my novel… don’t judge my lack of writing and that its empty I have been so busy.

Went back to work this week, after having completed just over 2 weeks of jury service, and some time in Birmingham at uni. Boy was it a shell shock returning to work.

I am in a new department though and its a million percent better. Anyway, short post, as I am brewing up some lengthier ones shortly.

The wife made me the shelves and the desk.

I just painted!!

It’s so nice to have a space thats just mine, I just wish it was complete. The desk is standing height at my request so I can stand and work at it, but definitely didn’t consider the fact that I need to have a stool before I can write at it!

#fail.

Also, I am ¬†wondering if this extremely rash quick decision is something to do with my mid twenties existential crisis…um possibly me thinks… *cough*

Sacha Black Creations inc.

There comes a time in life, when you are tired of thinking about your dreams, your sick of pondering about some far off future life you might have if only XY or Z happened. If only you could such and such.

Life’s too short.

So, I stopped bullshitting myself.

Only I can change my life, only I can do something about it. I need to stop waiting for something to happen, or waiting to be head hunted, or waiting to land on my feet. That doesn’t happen. You (I) need to open my own doors, and create my own opportunities, and that ain’t guna happen sat on my arse thinking about what I might or might not do.

If I am ever going to seriously finish this novel, or make any extra money, or have a creative job, or be a millionaire by the time I’m 35 I need to stop day dreaming, get off my slightly chubby backside and do something about it.

So I did.

I only took a tiny step, but it was a step nonetheless.

I have a studio.

It’s and office, come art studio, for all Sacha Black Creations. I am going to devote half of the space to my novel enterprise, and the other half to my art.

Its wonderful, and I cannot wait to get in there properly. To be honest, it’s probably a little more than I wanted to pay, but the space is bigger and I cannot complain, the light is fantastic, and the ‘feeling’ I got when entering was electric.

I went into another studio they had for rent, and I hated it, I was so disappointed and thought that I wasn’t going to find the right space, but then she told me that she had another space. It was more money but she had it if I wanted to look at it. So I did, and both the wife and I had massive grins as soon as we entered. You can just feel the creative juices oozing out of the walls. I am SO excited. It took me all of 2 seconds to decide. We both knew it was right instantly. That can only be but a good sign.

It’s 80 square foot. So about the length of my car both in width and length, as it is a square, and currently it is a square, and a total blank canvas…

*rolls up sleeves*

I will post photos of it as I decorate. But below are images of it as a shell… The person/dog in the photo is not me, its the owner of the studios… not that you can tell.

There are 11 artists in total, which is lovely because it means that I will have other artists to bounce off too if ever I hit writers/painters block.

Welcome to Sacha Black Creations… (I think thats a good company name… maybe I will call my company that!)

p.s. The studio is bigger than it looks in the photos, my camera phone hasn’t done it justice.