Tag Archives: in crowd

Too gay to be straight? too straight to be gay?

Why is it that so many sects of society are so clicky?? lesbians are literally the worst. How do we ever manage to date anyone new…. oh wait… we don’t… we end up sleeping with so many of our friends! (jokes)…. (mostly)

It annoys me that even lesbians pigeon hole each other… oh your a lipstick lez, oh your a vintage lez, oh your butch.

Don’t get me wrong, sometimes it’s comforting and nice to be pigeon holed, you can be proud of it, or meet similar friends etc etc.

BUT

I seemed to find myself in this odd situation where I am not really pigeon holed into any group.

Potentially a good thing; but in reality a massive problem.

When I go out now, people seem to give me odd looks. They just aren’t sure. They can’t put me in a box, I don’t quite fit a niche.

If I am in a straight bar, I don’t look straight, and therefore I don’t really get attention from men (thank god) but   it almost makes people uncomfortable that they aren’t really sure ‘what i am’. I sort of look like a lesbian, I have a patch of shaved hair, and wear trousers…. but I still look too feminine. Not that lesbians can’t be feminine, but thats often the stereotype straight people have.

Thing is, when I go to gay bars, lesbians don’t really think I am gay either. They also aren’t really sure, so I don’t get attention from them either!

I feel like I am in some kind of void of ‘unidentifiable’. Now I don’t really mind, because I won’t be changing to fit in a box, and luckily I have a wonderful girlfriend so don’t need any attention anyway. But it is a little frustrating when I am proud to be gay, I don’t necessarily want people to automatically pigeon hole me, but at the same time it would be nice to feel like I ‘fit’, and not to have those awkward stares when people are trying to work me out!!

Is it just me? Does anyone else ever find this?