Today is my son’s 2nd birthday. Even though I’ve written this in advance, trust me when I say, I cannot believe that two years has passed. Time has always seemed to fly by, but its at moments like this that I really get shocked at just how much has slipped through my fingers without me being mindful. I look at him with his curls bouncing under 3 feet of body, yeah – he’s already over half my height! I still wonder where on earth he came from, and how he can have been inside my tummy and yet, in two short years, talks and giggles and poops like a machine!
It got me thinking about just how similar being a parent is to being a writer. Here’s why:
ONE
I love my son unconditionally – even when he’s been naughty.
I love my WIP unconditionally – even when it’s been naughty and won’t finish a scene or keeps changing things
TWO
My son is extremely unpredictable – apparently he already has a mind of his own
My WIP is extremely unpredictable – it is prone to change its mind suddenly, adding an unexpected twist or killing off an entire character mid scene
THREE
My son drives me to insanity – when he doesn’t know the right words to tell me whats wrong
My WIP drives me to insanity – constantly when it halts suddenly in the middle of a scene and refuses to tell me how it ends and all I can do is sit and wait patiently until it decides to play ball
FOUR
My son exhausts me – keeping me up in the middle of the night
My WIP exhausts me – keeping me up in the middle of the night either writing it, or waking me up having thought of ideas
FIVE
I am extremely proud of my son – every time he does something new or smiles, or breathes for that matter!
I am extremely proud of my WIP – writing novels is hard work, and I am really proud to say that I amongst my crazy life I still find time to write actual novels
SIX
My son costs a shit load of money!
My WIP costs a shit load of money – I buy software and dozens of ‘how to write books’ thinking it will help me write better, not to mention the obsessive notebook collection I have going or the expensive research field trips!
SEVEN
My son makes me repeat myself constantly – ‘eat with your mouth closed, it’s YES not yeah, don’t pull the cats ear…’
My WIP makes me repeat myself constantly – remember those pesky crutch words I spoke about? in the secret to the quickest edit you can do? There are just some words that I can’t help but repeat!
EIGHT
My son makes me shout at him – when he’s been very very naughty like when I picked him up from the childminder the other day and he bonked another kid on the head and then tried to bite his leg!
My WIP makes me shout at it – in frustration when it won’t play ball or it made me write something silly AGAIN, or tricked me and made me rewrite a chapter for the 5th time.
NINE
My son needs a lot of attention – he needs love, and kindness and story time.
My WIP needs a lot of attention – spent tapping away mindlessly at the keyboard, or hours researching or editing.
TEN
My son is a cause for celebration – the first time he walked, his first word… hopefully his first poo on a potty!
My WIP is a cause for celebration – and toasting the end of the first draft – the end of the first edit… hopefully one day…publication?!
If you’re a parent – how does your WIP compare to parenthood? Or if you’re not a parent – what does your WIP do to you?
This marks the last day of NaNo – if you participated – did you win? Was your target 50K?
Next week, because NaNo is over I’m back to normal posts deconstructing the writing process see you then 🙂
They never leave home….
But yours have you have published them !
But they’re still there, calling on me, asking me to look at them again, demanding attention. I try and ignore them…
Haha! Very funny Sacha, and very true! ?
Hehe, back to normal next week!
Normal? Whatever that is!
I can’t believe how time flies, enjoy these times Sacha because before you know it your eldest is turning twenty this year and your youngest is sixteen! Very strange to think that soon my eldest will be out of her teen years! I enjoyed your post and yes there are definitely similarities to the effort involved in parenthood and writing! My MS is causing me much grief at the moment as I am editing it preparing it for publishing, after receiving a wonderful illuminating critique from an author’s advisory agency.
Hey Marje me neither, it has literally flown by. I bet you still see your children as your babies too – that’s the horrifying thing to me – my baby is a toddler.
Ahh yes I remember you saying you went for a critique its good to hear it is worth it :D. So exciting preparing for publishing, I can’t wait to get there.
Yes, they’ll always be your babies, just bigger versions! Sacha, the critique is well worth it I wish I had done it ages ago, I’m a terrible one for taking so long over decisions!
Well I may well pick your brains on that when the time comes
Very good post. Hopefully you won’t be shouting at your WIP for eighteen years or so until it leaves home.
ARGH, I hope not, thanks Mick
Very true
11 And later you can never stop worrying about them, even when there is nothing more you can do.
Will they get the university place they wanted, job they wanted, etc
Will it get good reviews, will people buy it etc
Oh god, Gordon thats a good point. I hadn’t even considered what happens AFTER they leave!
Fab post Sacha 🙂
Thanks Lucy
Every new book I published feels like giving birth to a child! There definitely are similarities and I love the 10 points you mentioned.
wow, and giving birth wasn’t exactly pleasant for me! hehe – I know what you mean though. What a magical experience over and over, I can’t wait.
Oh, sorry…. of course only as a metaphor… not following you long enough though! But it truly feels or is like giving life to something new!
Really enjoyed this. Ever so funny. By the way, I have a similarly themed guest post (already written and sent off to the blog) coming out next Monday! Great minds, I guess!
No way?! I love that you have a similar post coming 😀 Thanks for reading.
My gorgeous girl just turned nine and I cannot believe it, so I totally relate – time flies! And as to my WIP being like her, I would say that it is both unpredictable, and a great source of joy. Hope you get back to normal next week xx
9?? I can’t even imagine my boy turning 9. Glad you agree 😀
These are all true points! I’m not a mother, but I’m a teacher and a babysitter. I have to say that I feel the same way.
Thanks Rachel, yes you are, and I am glad you can relate anyway 🙂 hehe, it did make me giggle writing it.
This covers it pretty well. Mostly neither of them listen. Although leaving both unchecked tends to result in destruction or some kind of mischief. Worried when the characters and the kid are quiet. Kind of a sibling rivalry if I’m trying to work and he’s home wanting attention.
Hahahaha – YES Charles, how could I forget the mischief and mayhem! Bloody good point.
Think we all forget it until it returns from either camp.
You can at least send the child to their room to think about what they have done, there is no escape from your WIP 😀
hahahaha! you’re so right!
Sacha, Happy Birthday to your son! Only two and I know what you mean, those two years seemed to fly by with my son. Then the next thirteen disappeared in a blink too and my ‘little’ boy now towers over and is taking some GCSEs this year. I stop and wonder, how is this possible and when did that happen? Just treasure every moment. I loved your comparison between child and WIP, very well done and actually so true.
Thanks Annika, they really have flown by, don’t say that! I can’t bare how fast the time is flying already!.
I’ve thought this a few times myself. The gestation cycle was almost the same in my case. Trimester 1 (First draft) – Am I really going to ever publish this? Puke risk is high. Trimester 2 (Critiques & Re-writes): Your writing voice is starting to show. You’ve heard your story’s heartbeat. You start agonizing over titles. Friends now understand why you’ve missed coffee dates and wine tastings. Third Trimester (Final edits): Oh good lord, why aren’t you published yet! Your story feels fat and bloated in its word count and its kicks are keeping you up at night. But soon. Soon, you might just get to hold your finished product in your hands.
This made me seriously laugh Allie, like out loud snort your drink through your nose laugh. I am so glad you said the puke thing, because I had such bad morning sickness!
Excellent! Mine was awful too. I don’t miss that one bit.
How old are your babies?
7 and 3. Although I would have sworn they were just crawling.
Wow sounds like a handful to me!
And Happy Birthday to Mr. 2.
Thanks my lovely. 😀
Great post & happy birthday to your son. My children are 18 & 21 and I have 6 published novels. I’d like to add one more to your list. The terrifying day you have to let them go into the big wide world unsupervised. Enjoy your time with your son but I’m waiting for the day you hit the published button.
God – don’t the thought is terrifying! By the way, that is possibly the loveliest most encouraging thing anyone’s ever said. Thank you.
Loved this! Happy 2nd birthday to your son, it’s such a magical time when they’re little. I’m at the lucky stage where being a writer and being a parent coexist. I write young adult and have three young adults under my roof – yay! I’ve got writing a stroppy and sarcastic exchange down to a fine art ha ha! 😉
Thanks Shelley, I have adored the time, although its extraordinarily tough at times. Wow, you have the perfect test market right in your own home. Ideal! 😀
Sometimes you can’t make head nor tail of them…
haha! definitely should have included that!
Don’t even get me started. Ugh… Right on with these. #7… #9…
But, yes, both so worth it.
Happy birthday to your little one! ???
Thanks Sarah 😀 lovely little birthday although it ended with a nasty cough and fever. Sigh.
Aww. Poor guy! ?
The warmth one feels watching ones child develop through life. That little girl who found reading writing and documenting from a tender age of 3 and a bit,is now mummy and writer, so proud to read such wonderful comments left by fellow writers when I know you juggle life to fulfil your writing passion….Keep going beautiful daughter, were ALL waiting for the first publication.
Reblogged this on sherriemiranda1 and commented:
I am not a parent, but this post tells exactly why. If I had been a parent, I wouldn’t have had the time or energy to write and publish my FIRST novel, let alone the next two or three I have on the back burner.
Congrats to all you parents that managed to bring up a child (or two) and write a book (or two)! You deserve lots of accolades! 😉 <3
Peace, love & lots of time for writing to all,
Sherrie
Thank you so much sherries for the kind reblog
Ah… well one “child” is all I could handle for the time being… At least I can pretend to disregard my WIP when life gets too busy! 😀
Great analogies! 🙂
I’m not a parent but, being a dog owner, I can relate to most of these 🙂
Hi Sacha. I’ve had to laugh a few times while reading this, and have a few comments on it. Two – a two-year-old does have a mind of his/her own. At this age they learn so rapidly and like to try out everything they have learned. This gives them a new freedom – the freedom to choose what they eat, what they want or don’t want to do. They have a new power.
Three – You drive your son to insanity when YOU don’t understand what he is trying to say.
Six -yep they do. Besides the necessities, there are all the toys, gadgets, and the like that you just know he would love to have, and it is so much fun to indulge him.
Eight – Naughty? Maybe, or maybe he was acting out his frustrations on the other child. Perhaps the other child took a toy from him, bumped into him, or laughed at him.
Nine – Yes, they do need a lot of attention, and they thrive when they know they are the object of your love.
Ten – I wish you a lifetime of celebrations.
I agree with everything you say! I’d even say that as time goes by, there’s more time, love and attention poured on books than children. Now that mine have grown up and left home my books are still with me!
Haha true – the kids grow up and leave – books never do!